Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Inside FUNNIES!

Is this inmate gonna make it? You decide:

“Library Staff: I am in desperate need of some reading material A.S.A.P. please. I have read anything & everything available in my pod and cannot bear another day with nothing to occupy time except counting squares in the gate (812 per section, 12, 180 squares in all) or staring at walls lol. Anyway if possible could you please send #2 #3 #4 in the Gunslinger, Dark Tower series by Stephen King as well as anything by the following authors: Wambaugh, Turow, Sheldon, Cook, Koontz or” [Drum-roll please!] “James Patterson…I appreciate it greatly.”

This young man sure sounds like a Dot.com refugee who has fallen onto hard times or wound up on the other side of the law. Maybe it's time to create cyber-jails. It might alleviate the boredom to have touch screen walls and online university for every inmate. (I'm sure the Department of Defense would be willing to fork over the cash for a cyber-retrofit of all our nation's jails.)

Anywho, this patron will get his wished-for paperbacks: “Irreversible Errors, Vector, and Finnegan’s Week.” (James Joyce, laugh all you want at our terrible American Puns. Meanwhile, your native Ireland becomes a magnet for innovation and jobs, while here in the U.S.A., we’re fighting the war on error! oops, terror!)

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